The Worst Narcissists of Sex and the City

Now that Sex and the City is finally available on Netflix, both long-time fans as well as first-time viewers can enjoy all six seasons. It’s finally time to talk about some of the worst narcissists on the show, from more malignant narcissists to your garden-variety toxic person with narcissistic traits. See if you agree with the men and women listed here, and be sure to tune into the series on Netflix to do further “investigation.”

Mr. Big 

Of course, the biggest narcissist of the show is Mr. Big – a man who only wants Carrie when she no longer wants him, and continually ensnares her back into the toxic cycle when he sees that she’s moving forward without him – and even after all that, ends up marrying another woman, Natasha, only to cheat on that woman with Carrie. Talk about the longest situationship of all time. This off-and-on again relationship was one of the most toxic relationships to be glorified and romanticized on the show, and even to this day, the romance between Carrie and Mr. Big tends to be inspiration for pick-me women everywhere that one day their emotionally unavailable partner may one day morph into the Prince Charming who marries them. More realistically, however, like Mr. Big, your situationship is more likely to leave you at the altar, so it’s time to cut ties and save yourself the pain.

Richard

Hotel mogul Richard is a sex “addict” and commitmentphobic womanizing narcissist who pretends to change for Samantha, only to get caught cheating and plead for her forgiveness – just to betray her again. Richard is a toxic person who cannot stand to see Samantha “win” or one-up him, so he does everything possible to fake remorse just to get her interested and violate and hurt her once more when she’s moving on so he comes out on top. An important lesson is taught through Richard: never believe someone who says they’re going to change when they’ve shown you multiple times they are too egotistical and unempathic to do so – spend that energy and focus finding a more compatible mate.

Alexander Petrovosky 

Some may think of Carrie’s fiancé Alexander Petrovosky as romantic and brooding, but his coldness and aloofness as well as overall indifference suggests otherwise. When Carrie moves with him to France, Alexander is absolutely emotionally unavailable, continually abandoning Carrie and prioritizing his own work over his relationship. He is also dismissive of her dreams and life back in New York and is quite pretentious. Let this be a lesson to viewers: never move countries or even states just for a man – you never know who he’ll turn out to be. No one can forget that episode where Carrie was invited to a celebratory party for her book by local fans only for Alex to beg and plead Carrie to skip it to support him at his own art showing. Carrie sacrificed her party to tend to Alex after weeks of not being paid attention to, only for Alex to completely abandon her when she came to support him. The lack of support and the erasure of Carrie’s identity and success as she engages with Alex speaks for itself.

Berger 

Ah, Berger. No one can forget the infamous “break-up” post-it Berger left which overwhelmed Carrie – but that’s actually the least of his sins. Berger is your typical pathologically envious misogynist and narcissist who cannot stand having a woman that outshines him. Carrie supports his work as a writer, but when Berger is asked to do the same as Carrie’s success skyrockets, he fails to do so. Typical, and that’s a reason why some writers choose not to date other writers, or other people in their same field – the competitiveness can get rough if you’re dealing with someone who doesn’t support your success, and Berger’s sensitive ego got in the way of what could have been a flourishing relationship.

Trey’s Mother, Bunny

Trey’s mother Bunny is the prototypical narcissistic mother-in-law who monopolizes her son and tries to exert control over his life, micromanaging everything from his finances to his marriage. Like most narcissistic mother-in-laws, Bunny “competes” with her daughter-in-law Charlotte for power and control.

Carrie

This one may be controversial, but Carrie Bradshaw is definitely somewhat narcissistic. She’s certainly not a narcissist like the way the other people on this list are as she still possesses empathy and remorse, but her self-absorption often makes her a terrible friend, and her pick-me tendencies toward centering men over her close friendships, and always choosing men over her girlfriends, can make her a toxic person. Unlike most toxic people, however, she seems capable of changing with enough introspection and incentive.

Samantha

We love Samantha for how sexually liberated, spunky, and powerful she is. In contrast to Carrie, she’s a great friend. However, we can’t help but notice that she tends to go after married men, with no concern for their wives or girlfriends. This is what qualifies her as being placed on the list of at the very least having somenarcissistic traits and behaviors that shouldn’t be overlooked.

Skipper

Skipper is the fake “nice guy” narcissistic person who believes he is entitled to a woman’s romantic attention and affection. In one memorable episode, he interrupts sex with his girlfriend just to take Miranda’s call, showing that he’s more of a vulnerable-type narcissistic person who requires validation after being rejected and has little empathy for the women he exploits just to get over his ex.